Life as we know it
Well, I didn't get the job I wanted. What else is new right? I went on another interview last week...but it really isn't going to pan out. I am doing awesome on selling avon. Go me!
As for Master and I...Well we had a bit of a bump this week. After a long while, I gave in to one of his friend's advances (slightly gave in). He played with the top half of me (he is trying to learn to be a Master). He was S that came along on the outtie last week. Anyway...it really was awkward...and I felt like I was back at the beginning of BDSM again. Needless to say, we teased a bit online after that. Now S has only been interested in the lifestyle perm since he left his wife in November. He just recently started getting service. He met a girl online a couple weeks ago, who is newer than him. On Wednesday, he collared her. I tried to be understanding, since S and Master are close friends, but I felt someone had to tell him he was being an idiot. So I tried to in the nicest way I new how...(S and I are friends but not as close as Master and him are). I told him specifically that I was trying to speak to him as a friend. He has NEVER pulled the Master card on me. Because of the years of abuse I have been through it would crush me, and I would only see it as manipulated. Well, what did he do? Pulled the master card out...telling me it wasn't my place to speak to him about such. It flipped me out, and after so edgy discussion I tried to go to bed. But I was really hurt, so I went and talked to Master about it. We talked for a long time, and I sent the logs to Master. The next day Master read the logs, and decided that he could see how I could have gotten so hurt. Though he felt that he was meaning it as harshly as it came across to me. This really confused me..on top of that I had to appolgize for speaking to S in such a manner about his personal life. I did, but it was very hard on me. I don't want to loose S as a friend...but I don't want to be manipulated when it suits S. So, I told Master that I felt S and I could not play any longer. Master agreed.
While Master was talking to S, he got his logs from him about the conversation. I started pointing out what I had said really hurt, Master got upset at me for leaning over his shoulder and reading (without being invited). SO, I ended up having to kneel behind his seat. I know not how long I knelt there, only that my knees acted. He then released me to go do my chores. Off I went...when I returned Master asked me what was wrong. I, of course, said nothing. Though he drug out of me that the hurt I felt because of what S did was deeper than intial expressed. We talked on and on and I was crying. He had my face in his hands, and was talking to me. When he couldn't get my attention he tapped one my cheeks. It open one of those black doors I dread and I went hysterical. I took it as a slap, and I crashed. Master had to hang on, and at one point left the room. I started putting on my shoes to go take a walk, still crying. Master curled up with me, and helped me through it. I truly hate those doors that stand there, scary....
Than last night he walks down the hall, I'm passing to the bathroom. I turn to enter, and he leans close to my ear "I can't wait to fuck you." I have been needy ever since. You see it was our anniversay on the 22nd. Every year we fuck like crazy...a big scene. I'll let you know how it goes.
If anyone out there knows a cute, well behaved slut that would like to play...we are looking for a good plaything.
Hana
As for Master and I...Well we had a bit of a bump this week. After a long while, I gave in to one of his friend's advances (slightly gave in). He played with the top half of me (he is trying to learn to be a Master). He was S that came along on the outtie last week. Anyway...it really was awkward...and I felt like I was back at the beginning of BDSM again. Needless to say, we teased a bit online after that. Now S has only been interested in the lifestyle perm since he left his wife in November. He just recently started getting service. He met a girl online a couple weeks ago, who is newer than him. On Wednesday, he collared her. I tried to be understanding, since S and Master are close friends, but I felt someone had to tell him he was being an idiot. So I tried to in the nicest way I new how...(S and I are friends but not as close as Master and him are). I told him specifically that I was trying to speak to him as a friend. He has NEVER pulled the Master card on me. Because of the years of abuse I have been through it would crush me, and I would only see it as manipulated. Well, what did he do? Pulled the master card out...telling me it wasn't my place to speak to him about such. It flipped me out, and after so edgy discussion I tried to go to bed. But I was really hurt, so I went and talked to Master about it. We talked for a long time, and I sent the logs to Master. The next day Master read the logs, and decided that he could see how I could have gotten so hurt. Though he felt that he was meaning it as harshly as it came across to me. This really confused me..on top of that I had to appolgize for speaking to S in such a manner about his personal life. I did, but it was very hard on me. I don't want to loose S as a friend...but I don't want to be manipulated when it suits S. So, I told Master that I felt S and I could not play any longer. Master agreed.
While Master was talking to S, he got his logs from him about the conversation. I started pointing out what I had said really hurt, Master got upset at me for leaning over his shoulder and reading (without being invited). SO, I ended up having to kneel behind his seat. I know not how long I knelt there, only that my knees acted. He then released me to go do my chores. Off I went...when I returned Master asked me what was wrong. I, of course, said nothing. Though he drug out of me that the hurt I felt because of what S did was deeper than intial expressed. We talked on and on and I was crying. He had my face in his hands, and was talking to me. When he couldn't get my attention he tapped one my cheeks. It open one of those black doors I dread and I went hysterical. I took it as a slap, and I crashed. Master had to hang on, and at one point left the room. I started putting on my shoes to go take a walk, still crying. Master curled up with me, and helped me through it. I truly hate those doors that stand there, scary....
Than last night he walks down the hall, I'm passing to the bathroom. I turn to enter, and he leans close to my ear "I can't wait to fuck you." I have been needy ever since. You see it was our anniversay on the 22nd. Every year we fuck like crazy...a big scene. I'll let you know how it goes.
If anyone out there knows a cute, well behaved slut that would like to play...we are looking for a good plaything.
Hana
posted by floweringhana at 10:07 PM
1 Comments:
Thank you for this information... it is more freeing than you realize. I hope that S's dick falls off while f'ing some other female WHILE HE IS STILL MARRIED because he is f'ed up and selfish that he won't get the divorce papers completed. But don't you worry about me... I have found someone else as well.
Love,
M ex-wife of S
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