Father's Day Weekend

So here is our weekend. Friday was spent mainly grocery shopping for TheBee and me home with the girls. I got them off to bed at a decent time and all seemed well. TheBee and I download this game called Last Chaos. It's similar to WOW but free and I thought it would give us something to do jointly instead of him just playing his gaming stuff by himself and me having to stare at the tv. Needless to say it didn't work out that way. It's a WONDERFUL game, a bit hard to figure the ins and outs but I don't play and I hate reading instructions so it took Master getting on and leveling up before me to tell me what I was suppose to do and stuff. So if you love that kinda of stuff sign up here: http://lastchaos.aeriagames.com/

So Saturday morning was spent with a struggling baby all over us while we tried to play until I got so frustrated I just gave up trying to do anything but get ready. We went to finish the grocery shopping, which wasn't much but the little one is so hard to take anywhere. She wants in and out of the cart. Than she wants to sit on my lap while I drive the electric wheel chair. Than she has to put the stuff in the cart like big sis. IT's on and on. She got a yogurt at the store and before you know it had it all over her hands, legs, clothes, seat, and just everywhere. It was crazy. So we went home. Let Bitty nap and all that stuff and listen to her cough a bit because her congestion is getting to her. We woke her up right before we had to jet off again to a swim party with are ABF from church. It was raining but I packed the suits just in case. As I know the kids very well. We get there, and of course into the cold water they have to be. So, after about 2 hours of freezing and swimming Bitty had to potty. That was the signal to get out of dodge and we got. I had lots of cute time with one of the ladies little boy. As I didnt swim with my whale size body. The baby is about 6 mon, but he so small and cute. He is the youngest of 4 and the only boy. Poor soul. I held him so mom could swim with the next up little girl. We got home and I realized I left my purse out the house. Several phone calls later I got someone to bring it to church on Sunday. We ate hamburgers and hotdogs there so no need for dinner. We let the girls run around like demons and than got them ready for bed. Bitty doesn't want to do bath's anymore I am not sure why. She is in the way independent stage. "NO I do it" is about all I hear. She is every increasingly testing my buttons. We get the girls down finally about 10pm, and than we decide to have a little father's day fun of our own. It was going great until Master decided to pull out the lube we got from a friend for my bday. As soon as the plastic was off I knew it would be a big no no, but what can I say. Peppermint is just not a good thing on sensitive bits part. After deciding against it and cleaning him off of that crude I was totally out of the zone. Of course that's the time that he is done and wants to play with me, since we aren't having any pentration. Now he places his hand on my bit parts and goes at it. I feel the burning and am running through my head what it could be. I say "Is that the had you lubed with?" He says "Uhhh yeah." "Ok don't use that hand. He gets distracted again and bam again he uses it. So I just sigh, and he just says "I'll play with the top you do the bottom" Of course I can get myself off. So there I go and off I am. I go take a good hot bath and hope for the best. But to know avail I get an infection. FUCK! Anyway. Church in the morning, and than lunch and back to walmart for a few things. Bitty crying at me and running way to far ahead insues. I leave walmart frustrated and wanting to hid. We get home finally and get her in nap world. My mom calls to wish Master a happy father's day. They talk a bit and I have to call her back to see if she's talked to dad. Come to find out he said he emailed me. so I searched my 5 email accts to finally find his. I email him back letting him no basically it's ok to talk as long as you stop being an ass. So he calls. We talk a bit, he's uncomfortable and doesn't sound good. Wanted to know if we would take in his cat. We probably will. Than he talks to the girls and TheBee and we say our good byes. All in all it went ok.

So that's our Father's day here

How was yours?

Hana

Him Part 17

There are only two post left in this story so here you go..

Disclaimer: What you are about to read is purely fiction. The names in here are fantasy and nothing written has every truly happened. They are just deep thoughts from a deep place within me.

Years flew by without even a thought in my mind of anything else but serving Michael in all the new ways he demanded. Each month brought a new surprise or learning experience. Each year brought a reaffirming of my commitment. We had many parties over the course or the time. Joshua and Jennifer married by law three years after her collaring, and they started having children. She spent weekends, once every couple of months, at our house. But as the children got older she spent less and less time away from home. I went to several parties outside the house, some work related while others were a part of our intimate lifestyle. I enjoyed both and thrilled at each detail. I met so many amazing people, and learn many new skills. My mind subconsciously started taking in little strides that where unnoticeable disobedience. If I was doing the filing, and lunch was at noon, I would wait until 11:00 to start to file. Or when taking my morning walks I would rest at the park and watch the kids swing before continuing back home. Little things that I saw as my time away from the norm. Michael’s job started becoming more demanding and so he was home less and less. Heather and Big John became a more serious couple, and they moved out of the house. As Michael’s demands got less he cut back on the staff needed on an everyday occurrence. There were many times that I sat in the library with a good book and a ham sandwich, with not a soul in the house. As time spanned I got less and less worried about what would happen, and more comfortable in what I felt formed to the moment. I had a daily schedule, but with no one to keep me in it I simply did all the things at the end of the day or first thing in the morning. Leaving the rest of the days to myself. I spent as much time as possible reading and laying in the hammock. One Friday Michael came home in a hurry. “Get Dressed in something nice!” he yelled over his shoulder on the way up the stairs. I followed him quickly, and went to pull the items for a party out of his closet. He stepped out of the stem of the shower and yelled at me “leave it there is no time, get ready now!” I did quickly with nothing more than a black dress he bought me for valentine’s last year. I fixed my hair in a casual curl and put some nice jewelry on. I was just finishing applying my lipstick when Michael smiled over my shoulder “You look lovely let’s go.” I rushed into my shoes and he tugged me out of the room and towards the stairs. I grabbed my purse out of the closet near the door and we were gone. We arrived in a rural part of the country onto a ranch house. I knew the house well, and saw Joshua approaching us immediately. “I am so glad you could make it Michael come in” Josh said has he wrapped his arm around his shoulder and started walking towards the house. I took one last look at myself in the side view mirror and than off I went after them. I found the group of giggling slaves quite easily, and upon my arrival we all started walking further into the gardens. A couple of the girls placed their feet into the water fountain, and we gabbed for hours about the new things we were doing that we never before thought we would do. I drank glass after glass of red wine, and as I started giggling and splashing my feet Jennifer eyed me suspiciously. She left for a few and upon her return I never again saw another glass a wine that night. I was quite gone already though so when some of the girls whispered about what their owners faces looked like when they were mad I wanted in on the conversation. I leaned inwards and thought I was whispering, but with the added alcohol level I was way above a whisper. “Oh Yeah!” I belted, “You haven’t seen nothing til you see Michael fuming…” I paused to burp and all the boys and girls giggled with me. All except Jennifer who left again. “Well, first his eye brows furrow..” And I took my fingers to help make my eyebrows do it. “Than his face sharpens like a crazed lion, sometimes I think he is going to growl…growl..growl..” everyone laughed encouragingly as I made paws out my hands and growled. “Next he lets out this deep sigh…like this….” I raised my chest as high as it could go and than let all the breath out of my lungs at once, spitting everywhere. More laughter followed, “And finally if he is really angry his foot will tap…watch” I had just stood up when throats started clearly, but being as drunk as I was I never understood there meaning. Instead I stood on the edge of the fountain with my arms crossed and my face forced inward, my lips out, and my foot tapping. But when I went to make a paw out of my hand again I lost my balance and started falling towards the water. My eyes went wide and just as I was about to land flat it in it I felt my dress being tugged so hard that I fell tumbling onto the ground. I shock my head to clear the long hair in my face and when I raised my eyes to say “thanks” I saw the tapping foot infront of me. I blinked once, twice, three times, and the foot was still there. I crawled over to it and touched it to see if it was really real. When it stayed there I swallowed hard and just sat there in the dirt. I thought if I closed my eyes real tight he would just disappear. The next thing I know I am being dragged up by my hair and pulled across the grounds, into the wooden floor, and across the carpet (dirty feet and all). When we reached the door I came to my senses somewhat and grabbed for the door. Anything to keep from the forward motion that was sending me out of the house. I was in full panic and when he pulled and I didn’t followed he turned slightly. I heard a sound I never thought I would hear from his being. The voice that followed was not human or kind, it was some sort of force beyond all thought. It screamed at me “You did not just grab that door.” I was so scared I didn’t know whether to let go or not. But when my body started rejecting the liquor inside I let go, only to avoid throwing up on the floor. I open my mouth to warn him, and he threw me down and was going to do god knows what to me when my stomach hurled its whole contents onto his shows and than I peed on myself. He took his shoes off infront of me and walked back towards the house. Slamming the door behind me. I didn’t move the whole time he was gone, and took each moment to try to get control of all the poundings in my body that were going on at once. I heard the door open, but when Jennifer’s voice hit my ears I was in shock. “ Hannah can you stand on your own?” I nodded. “Good I am to take you home, bath you, and put you in the den cage to wait.” She did exactly that. Once in the dark of his den I cried and cried and cried, until I could cry no more. When I finally fell asleep hours later I could think nothing but regret…..

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Him Part 16

Disclaimer: What you are about to read is purely fiction. The names in here are fantasy and nothing written has every truly happened. They are just deep thoughts from a deep place within me.


The weeks flowed by smoothly, followed by the month. Each month brought new skills gained, and by the end of 6 months I was doing all of Michael’s office necessities. This included organizing all the servants’ informational files and paying the bills. It had been a year since Jennifer led me to the party. I hadn’t spoken or seen her sense. I did hear, through the grapevine, that another man not far from here owned her. Though Michael and this man were friends, Jennifer never graced our home. At the beginning of the summer I helped plan Michael’s yearly get together. The same party I had attended. As I went through the invited guest, to make sure all had responded, I noticed the man that supposedly had Jennifer was coming. I was almost too overjoyed to think, and as I stood I knocked the small table I had in my lap on the floor. Spilling all the cards everywhere. I raced to pick them up in a hurry and reorganized them even faster. I took a deep sigh when no one came around the corner to reprimand me. As the days grew closer and closer I had all but forgot about Jennifer’s maybe arrival. I was swarmed with making sure all the servants were in order and all the food had arrived on time to prep, I had little time for any ideal thinking. When the day arrived and all was clicking I was very much at ease. So when Michael hugged a dark haired gentleman and they started walking my way I was so distracted I never saw the girl behind them. Michael cleared his throat “Hannah, this is Joshua. Josh this is my little Hannah.” I blushed profusely and tried to curl into the floor, but remember my manners. I curtsied slightly to him and wished him welcome. The men step apart with a chuckle and Jennifer stepped up. I was in a state of shock, I took a step forward to run to her but than thought twice. Michael eyed me and than said “Is everything in order?” I nodded and than when his eyebrow raised said “Yes Master.” “Than you have 15 min with your friend.” I ran to her and we hugged, giggling out the back french doors. We talked like we had never been apart, it seems we both had gone through some major changes. When her watched beeped I pouted slightly, but her smile encouraged me. “Don’t worry we will be seeing each much more.” We gave a quick hug and I ran to get everyone settled into the main room. Just as I had done it Michael stood up and announced that we were all going on the back porch for so much needed air. I was confused, but helped everything get their barrings again and flow where he wanted them to go. Once outside I could not truly see anyone until people started being seated. When the crowd settled two men were standing the sands before me. One was Michael and one was Joshua. I titled my head slightly and Michael tilted his head back. Joshua made a snapping sound and Jennifer instantly pranced onto the sand and kneeled at his feet. I was still in a state of shock that I didn’t notice Michael’s command. He had to physical take a step forward for me to refocus myself. “Please excuse Hannah this is not what she was expecting. I thought it would be better performed as a shock to her.” He chuckled and all followed in his laugh. I moved forward slightly if not a bit nervous and settled in the sand below me. Jennifer took my hand and squeezed it. I still had no idea what was about to happen. Not until I saw the gleam in the sunlight. The shine of silver was unmistakable. It was the collar I had order months ago upon his request. The round steel was hand flattened and had no rough edges. He had it engraved with his family crest and a snake, a cobra to be exact. It slithered all the way around and the head and tail met at the sliding lock in the back. It was a piece of art in itself. He was talking to everyone but all I could hear was a loud buzzing in my ears. I shock my head slightly to try to get it out, but still no sound fell to my ears. I held my breath and tried to calm and that is when my ears gave my hearing back. Just as Michael was saying “I place this on your neck as I sign of personal ownership of you. It will never leave and you will always be mine” Before I could respond the cold steel touched me and I shivered before the click was heard. Another click immediately followed and I realized than Jennifer was being collard at the same time. Michael touched my cheek gently as tears rolled down my face. Without warning he grabbed me up by my hair, I screamed but only heard Jennifer’s yell. I was so lost again. I was dragged through the sand to a pole and was tied legs spread securely. Than a lever was pulled, and the wood rose out of the sand and turn parallel to the earth. I knew than what was happening and I pulled on my bonds all anew. I heard the crackle of the fire, and saw the iron red hot as it approached me. Jennifer’s fingertips touched my hand and it made me turn to look at her. The iron hit without me seeing it, and took a few seconds for me to feel. I screamed into the night air as it burned into my skin. I called Michael names I never thought I’d utter. When he removed the branding iron Jennifer was screaming. Michael leaned close to my ear “You know you are going to regret not hold your tongue.” I swallowed and than he released me and carried me into a waiting cleansing bath inside the house. When I was asked to make two baths I didn’t question, but now I know why he had the tubs placed in the same room. We were than carried to our rooms, lathered with cream and told to rest. It took several days before I could walk on it again. So through the weekend I ran the party by walkie talkies. When it was time for Jennifer to finally go home I cried and we swore to see each other more often. Though we really had no say over that. My punishment was really not as harsh as I had expected, he simply made me stand in the corner with gum on my nose while I was naked. Life became one big love. I spent my days in service, my heart in love, and my body thoroughly used. All was well and all was great!

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So last night was masturbation city at Master's house. He had put bengay on his leg and so no sex for us. I am to sensitive..LOL. So it started out with him playing with me while we watched tv, really not doing much for me. For some reason since the baby I have been not really able to really turn myself on. Which is weird because last time I was ready to go. Master was all excited that this time he would get "pregnancy sex" which is like all the time. Anyway, So when that didn't work he started masturbating. He seemed to get distracted to like the good girl I am I said "You want me to show you my tits or ass or something." I was purely joking and teasing but he thought it was a great idea. So off my shirt went. He had me play with myself and watch him play. Of course this lead to him pinching my nipples and turning them, and me getting more and more happy. Have you ever had pregnancy nipples pinched? Well let tell you it hurts like you are on fire, but it sent wonderful shockwaves right to my cunt. As I got closer and closer, but still was having problems. He did what he has rarely done, he lean over into my ear and in a deep voice said "Cum for me bitch, your such a hot whore. Fucking cum already" within in seconds I had such huge orgasms I was bouncing all over the bed. Than he came all over me and we took a warm shower kissing and necking. It was good..damn good! Better than cock! Did I say that? Well that was last night, and I think it was the rain.

Keep your fingers crossed it happens again. BTW, for all you story watchers the next post will up after this.

Hugs

Hana

Him Part 15

I know you all have been desperately waiting for this so here you go..LOL

Disclaimer: What you are about to read is purely fiction. The names in here are fantasy and nothing written has every truly happened. They are just deep thoughts from a deep place within me.

The weeks flew into another, each week I gradually fell into the cycle of the house. My mind followed my body, and before I knew it I was moving to the rhythm of service. My smile at dinner was genuine, but still no one was talking to me. Now not even Ruth would speak to me after what happened to Larissa. Another month went by and I was finally called to Michael’s office. I was so elated that I didn’t even hesitate. I practically ran and had to catch my breath to knock demurely. When a female voice told me to enter I swallowed slightly, but entered anyway. I kept my eyes downcast and walk slowly to the place infront of the desk. Heather’s voice hit me first “Well, you are right. But she still owes me.” I knew they weren’t talking to me, and so I kept my place and waited. I hoped Michael would stand between Heather and I. He sighed slightly and said, “Your correct dear, but I don’t want her damaged. You will do it here in front of me, and than you are even and we move on.” “Oh don’t worry we’ll move on.” She chuckled evilly. I swallowed and heard her step back from her chair and approach me. “Hannah, I hear you have been reading the manuals.” She said from behind me. As it wasn’t a question I didn’t answer. “Hmm, well I hope you read them well. Stand!” she commanded. I took a few steps back and spread my legs about shoulder width apart. I slowly rolled my spine up to a more regal position, while rolling my shoulders back. My neck erected to where my eyes would meet Michael’s at level, but instead I slightly lowered them. I could see just under my forward vision, his face had no expression. I slide my hands into the crevices of my lower back, placing the right on the left and took in a deep breath to try to relax. Her wicked laughter followed, “Well, well. That was impressive. Now bend forward hands on the desk.” I did as she instructed and tried to make my hands not shake as I place them against the oak. I felt her body press up against my bottom, and she slowly rose up the hem of my skirt, and lowered my panties. “Now you will count them, and thank me. Let’s begin.” The first slash of her cane almost sent my knees buckling underneath me. It definitely was thinner and shorter than Michael’s. I cleared my throat and got a squeaky “1, thank you Mistress” out before the next one hit. This went on for a round of 20, and by the end I was crying so profusely that water had covered the edge of his desk. She patted my bottom at the end, and said rise. I moved back into my previous position. Her hand tilted under my chin and she told me to look at her. When my snot-covered face was exposed with my tear filled eyes she smiled “Don’t ever make me loose a girl again. Do you understand?” I cleared my throat “Yes Mistress.” I said. “Good, now I will leave you with your Master,” she kissed my forehead and walked out. I lowered my eyes again and he cleared his throat. “Your punishment has been lifted and you will be changing rooms. You no longer will work in the kitchen. See the butler for you new assignment. You may leave.” I was so elated I wanted to kiss him, but instead I nodded and walked out. I ran to the bathroom first and clean myself up, making sure to place some cream on the marks on my bottom. I raced to the front door to find the butler; he was all smiles as always. “You did good Hannah, you are now a house maid. Upstairs is your domain. Sarah is up there and she will show you to your room.” I hugged him and than got my things out of the room Ruth and I shared. I walked fast paced upstairs to find Sarah. She showed me the girls dorm, and where to place my things. We then went through the instructions of upstairs. I paid close attention and than the clock chimed for lunch. She handed me my new uniform, I quickly changed and we hurried downstairs. As I was no longer a kitchen maid I got to sit with all the servants at the eat- in kitchen. It was so good to have people to talk and laugh with. I smiled down the table at Sarah and knew I was going to love it here more and more each day.

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Him Part 14

Disclaimer: What you are about to read is purely fiction. The names in here are fantasy and nothing written has every truly happened. They are just deep thoughts from a deep place within me.

The week passed by slowly for me, I spent my mornings doing food service and chores. In the afternoon, when everyone else had free time, I spent my moments polishing silver or running laps around the back yard. I spent my evening reading manuals that were left on the library shelf; George thought it was a good way to train my brain what my body already wanted to submit to. On Saturday a women guest arrived for Michael, and when he took her upstairs that night in nothing but a see through white negligee I thought I would never make it. I lay in my bed and turned away from Ruth and cried softly. She said nothing to me and simply went to sleep. When Sunday evening arrived I was sure the demerits meeting would be held soon, but when no one came for me I became slightly worried. By bedtime all the servants had either received praise or punishment for the previous week, all accept me. I saw Ruth cheerfully come in with her new book, she went on and on about the shopping trip she and others were allowed to go on. When I didn’t want to hear anymore I raised the covers over my head and said good night. She huffed slightly and got ready for bed without another word. I instantly felt guilt, but I just didn’t feel emotionally that I could handle her schoolgirl ramblings. The next few weeks went by the same, with each passing week I became more and more lonely. Which each Sunday came a new gift or a privilege for Ruth, which she randomly would tell me about. After four weeks of nothing but polished silver in the afternoon I cracked. I simply laid my head down and cried. For when I walked in Friday afternoon to find a whole table over pouring with silver that needed polishing. I accomplished one fork when George checked in on me two hours later. I cleared my throat and tried to swallow my sniffles, but there was no way to hide that I just didn’t do anything but cry. He came close to me, a bit of concern on his face. He talked to me for a good hour about how crying was only going to get me demerits and that if I wanted this to be over with I had to find a way to pull out my inner strength. As he talked he would polish an item, or I would. He must have been gone for quite awhile because neither of us heard Michael’s entrance. “George.” Which he said with much restraint. Though his posture of leaning against one wall with a leg propped up didn’t show any hint of displeasure. I thought George was going to jump through the ceiling, and than his face blushed and his head lowered. He said, with a well-defined tone of experience, “I beg your pardon Sir. I will find my way out.” I allowed my eyes to trail from George’s leaving form to Michael to try to get some clue of what was coming. Michael’s body moved so fluently I never saw his slap coming, but when it made contact with George’s face I heard it all through my body. “George if I ever see you doing her work again, that will be the least amount of kindness I show you.” George simply nodded and left the room. I thought Michael would say something to me, but instead he simply turned and walked out. Leaving me thinking nothing but how I despised him. I lifted a teapot in anger and was aiming for the door he just exited out when Ruth stepped through. I tucked it back on the table swiftly and started my scrubbing with renewed despise. “Hannah, Master wants to see everyone in the livingroom.” I didn’t move or look up when I said, “He doesn’t mean me”. She shook her head, “Yes he does, and he specifically asked me to come get you.” I tilted my head and her and took her hand encouragingly. I entered the space and curled on the carpet with the other girls. There were none of the male servants in the group so I knew something was up. There were four men in chairs next to Michael, two on either side. Along with Big John, Heather, and Leon (The hired man for the horses). All the girls were sending their excitement through the air, when I settled I felt the static try to flow me into it. I had never seen what was coming, and had not been spoken to in weeks. My excitement had left my body long ago. The man to Michael’s left stood and the room went so silent I could hear the crickets chirping outside. He said not a word as he traveled the edge of the area rug. He made two passes before reaching into the gaggle of girls and pulling out the brunette, Sarah. He tossed her over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes and patted her bottom. She giggled playfully in response as he stepped out of the crowd and up the stairs. I was still staring bug eyed upstairs when the next man stood. I inched closer to Ruth not wanting to be picked in this ridiculous game of catch. When he stopped close to me and reached in it took all my strength not to scream. Though instead of me he grabbed Ruth and she gleed with happiness. There were somewhere around twenty girls in the house currently, and by the time 7 had been chosen and exited I knew that Michael would never pick me. I didn’t lower my eyes like the other girls but simply stared at his face. I felt that if he was going to make me watch him leave with another girl, I was going to show him it didn’t bother me. He leaned back for a moment and stared into the crowd. His eyes so intent on what he was looking at I felt my stomach turn. Not once did I lower my eyes, even as his beast started invading his face. He stood with his work boots booming on the floor, and as he passed through the middle of the crowd, girls swayed or rapidly moved out of his way. He grabbed a blond, Larissa, by her hair and pulled her after him. She screamed but never really struggled and when he reached me he bent down to my eye level. I was sure that a slap was coming, but I bore my eyes right back into his baby blues. He simply pointed to the stairs “Move!” He said with a voice that bounced off the walls. I raised a slow smile to him and said matter-of-factly “I thought you weren’t talking to me.” His eyes flashed red but when he didn’t hit me I was again perplexed. He simply turned and grabbed a dog leash off the front walk. I heard it and Larissa drag behind him as he made the trek back to me. I smiled again “Oh! So now you’re going to beat me. Well let me get in position.” I started to raise my arms as to remove my top, and before I had my hands on the cloth I felt the cold metal loosely hanging around my neck. Definitely not what I was expecting, and since I was not equiped to hide my emotions yet Michael knew my reaction immediately. “Check mate Bitch!” He said and began to walk away with the leash in one hand and Larissa in the other. As he made large strides it took no time for the metal to grasp around my throat. I gagged and stubbornly stayed still as the chain tightened and tightened. When I started turning blue one the girls shoved me after Michael. “Move you idiot.” I moved than to the landing just as he landed on the middle rung. He never slowed down; though I made efforts to keep up they were defeated as I waited to long to follow. Each second step he took tightened the chain around my throat I lost air. I never paid attention where we were going and when a large wooden door slammed behind me I jumped. I was in the room alone with Michael and Larissa. I took in the domineering feel of the room we entered. The bed was made out of logs, as well as all the furniture. When I looked for Michael he was ripping Larissa’s clothes off of her and digging his teeth into any exposed flesh. She was moaning and arching her body in response. He still had a firm grip on the leash and was now starting to pull it closer and closer to his body. I saw small bits of blood escape places Michael had before he tossed her onto the bed. By that time I had made my gradual crawl across the hardwood to his feet. He held the length of the chain between us so tight it lifted me off the ground. When I was just touching he looked down into my eyes “Do you think you can do as your told now? Or do I need to time you up?” I was to scared to answer, the masks he had hid so well was eroding and the man behind it was a demon I had never wished to call. He screamed in my face “ANSWER ME!” I felt his breath pass my face and I tried to control the sob in my throat “Yes…Master.” He nodded and with one swoop tossed the chain off of me and threw me down to the ground. “Stay!” He commanded. I swallowed and didn’t move, I don’t think I could have moved if I wanted to. My whole body felt as it had become ice and was frozen in place. He than went to Larissa, who was screaming terribly by now. I am sure this is not what she wanted when she dreamed of Michael enjoying her. His body covered her in shades and rage, as he slammed all his energy into the crevices of her womanhood. He slapped her several times and when she tried to crawl away once he grabbed her ankle and slammed her down on her stomach. When he let out a feral growl of release and got off of her I could see the blood dripping from her rectum. He picked up the phone and mumbled into it. Heather and Big John stepped through the door. She took one look at the Larissa and than at me. She pounced before I could react and got one good slapped in before John was pulling her off of me. It was painful but left no lasting damage. I knew the next time I was in her clenches I would pay, would pay heavily. They then picked up Larissa and walked out of the room with her. She would need many stitches and several weeks to heel, but she never held this night against me. I was dismissed immediately after Heather’s departure. Two months later Larissa decided this was not what she wanted, and was sent in a taxi to the airport to go back home. I still miss her to this day.

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The weekend

The weekend was kinda blah. Friday I spent a hour at walmart debating a package I was suppose to have delivered, site to store, from my mom to the girls. They refused the packages, but it took a hour of walking back and forth across the entire store and calling customer service to figure it out.

Than we rushed home before another big storm hit, though were we live no tornadoes just lots of rain. On Saturday we laid around the house, watching tv. Than went to the mall and let the girls ride the indoor train. On Sunday, after church we went to meet Master's Dad and step mom for lunch. Good and bad it was, his dad won't be watching the babies so we are going to have to find another avenue. I am not sure what yet. Than Master went to play kickball with the church and I pulled the ground cover out of our bushes area. This way I can plant my flowers next weekend. I didn't get it all done because Bitty decided to chase the cat around the house, and I looked up and she was gone. I panicked and raced around the house and tanned her hide good. Than into the house we went.

Oh and I started bleeding again, DAMN IT!

That's my weekend

Hana

The seesaw

Today I am going to write about balance and how it plays out in my life. I have had lots of people over the years say things to me like: Your so happy, your so sweet, your so nice, your so strong, your amazing, etc. But what people don't realize is a I hid behind huge walls of brick and morter. Things I have built for years, so have not been up that long...some have been up a long while. So when I write about my past I write it from behind the multitude of walls. It's like looking in from a crack and know there's this huge wall infront and so no harm and no feeling. When I lived in those moments it was nothing like that, my fear and depression was serious and devastating. When I met my ex I was ready to die, and would have chose it if my best friend at the time didn't pull me out and show me there was a reason to live. It cost me a lot to leave my ex. 4 years without my oldest and not knowing were she was. It hurts still today, and each time she leaves to see her dad I worry they will run with her again. So I live my life on a seasaw of sorts. On the right is the slave I think I want. You know the kneeling, the nudity, the completeness into the abyss. On the left is my imitate family and friends. My kids stand right next to me on this side, and as you slowly stretch out to my parents more and more walls come up and more and more mask come on. So when someone from church who hears the story of my husband being diagnosed with cancer 2 months after our premature infant was born, and they say to me your so strong. They really have no idea what lives inside me, what grows like a vine over each wall. I have to spray just to keep it away from ever touching me. Than there is the middle were I think all is peach. But it really isn't. I am not what I want to be as a mother,slave, or wife. Anytime I start to move to the right to gain more of myself I fall so hard and so fast I have trouble recovering. My Master lifted his hand to slap me about over a year ago. I cried for three days and he never touched me. But if he totally walked away, we removed the collars and all that it involved I would be on shaking ground I would loose my connection with the world again. Some of you know that I stripped for many years after leaving my ex. I needed the money and I had to find a way to get it. The money came easy, and the men came even easier. Life there was sweet, and I could buy whatever I wanted. The catch? The alcohol to hide my soul and my heart, the woman I became so manipulating. I had become so good at it that I could watch a man walk in and know whether he had money, and if I could get it from him with just one glance. It took me getting pregnant to get out of the business, and still today I have trouble leaving the easy money behind. My father refuses to talk to me, and though thats devastating it's own right I desperately need to talk to him. I don't know why he never encouraged me a day in my life. But it's like this addiction. TheBee he says that if we have a boy and my dad calls he is going to tell him that he knows what kind of person he is now and that the kids don't need that kind of person in their lives. I know he is right, i know they are better off with people that love them complete. But he's my dad and it's so painful and so hard. It tears me up inside to think I have to say to him...ENOUGH! I just don't have it in me. Why am I telling you all this? Well I know some who have fallen off their seesaw lately, and I want them to know your not alone.

Anyway meet my seesaw life

Hana
~Robert's little flower~

Him Part 13

Disclaimer: What you are about to read is purely fiction. The names in here are fantasy and nothing written has every truly happened. They are just deep thoughts from a deep place within me.


He cleared his throat and shuffled through some papers. I sat and waited with a smile, though my impatience was starting to get the best of me. When he finally looked up and closed his fingers together I let out a deep breath. “Hannah, I have discussed with your trainers what to do about your demerits for this week. It seems we are in a bit of a pickle with you. Normally girls coming upstairs don’t have demerits, as they want to avoid going back downstairs. But you seem to be a special case, and since I don’t think putting back downstairs will advance your training. We are going to do something unscripted. Your choices are the same, you can take what is coming and start over. OR you can choose to leave.” Michael paused for sometime and I just stared at him unsure what to say. When I said nothing in response he simply made a note and continued. “First, stand move the chair to the left. Than take your clothing off and place it in the chair. Upon returning to the pervious position, place your hands on the desk while in a standing position. “ I looked at him awe struck for a moment, I must have looked confused because Michael simply rolled his wrist to look at his watch and than said “Anyday now Hannah. I have guests waiting for me.” I swallowed and said, “Yes Master.” After which I simply got up and did a few moment to place the chair in position. I turned slightly and began to undo the closures that held my garments on. When I placed the black silk on the chair and slipped off my shoes I closed my eyes for a moment. “Now turn towards me,” Michael said calmly. I held my head down to my chest not wanting them to see the blush or the tears that arose as I loosen the bra from my body, and my hands found the clips to undo the thigh highs from the garter belt. “Raise you head Hannah and lift you eyes.” He voice stated though when I lifted my eyes a saw his slowly turn into the evil I saw the first night. Tears than were unstoppable and I had to swallow hard to keep the sobs from overtaking me. Being naked infront of him was one thing, even before Heater or Big John, but having several pairs of eyes watching my every move was overwhelming. My hands were shaking when I laid them on the desk, but when I set my legs in place and Michael smiled at me it had such a look of “your mine” my anger at him rose before I could control it. He stood staring at me, and I stood in position staring back defying him with my eyes each moment. He stood up and I didn’t follow his movement, I told myself I was prepared for whatever he had coming. I smelled his musky scent as he came close to me. His mouth so close to my ear I could hear his breathing, he whispered in a low tone. “You know you won’t win this game right bitch?” I whispered back “I didn’t we were playing a game, but if you want to play let’s play.” He than reached between my legs, dipped his finger between my thighs, and brought it to my nose. “You know you smell your little cunt calling to me.” He said. Before I could answer the cane came swishing down across my upper back. It was intense I had to take in a deep breath and tell myself to continue to breath. When the second hit made contact and I dug my nails into his desk he grabbed a hold of my neck and slammed me into the desk. “No need to ruin my wood.” He voice trailed into my ears and the lines of fire covered my upper back with rapid succession. By the time he stopped I was in such a state of anger and feeling of him close making me need him more. I had allowed the people in the room to fade and centered on just winning the battle so much that when his cock rubbed up against the entrance of my cunt and his words touched my ear I was complete void of any other thought. “Do you want my cock in you? You know this would truly make you a whore. Come now whore tell me how much you want to feel me. How much you have craved for me to do exactly what I am doing. Tell the good people what you need.” His voice was filled with darkness and lust. I could only get out the word “yes” before his cock was slamming into me and forcing my body across the carpet until my hips slammed into the desk. He held my neck in its new position easily and as his pounding increased he increased the pressure on my neck. I close my eyes and tried to concentrate of small slow breaths. By the time he pulled out of me and covered my lower half with his semen I was starting to feel dizzy and lighted head. He released his hold enough for me to gain air. Which I took lots of. Than he said one last thing from behind me “Stay just like that don’t move” I heard the door behind me open and shoes move in. Than Michael’s voice say “Don’t straggle come in, I want everyone to see what happens to slaves who think they rule this house or rule me. Come on, come in.” I heard mixed voices some of girls I recognized some I didn’t, some male voices mingled inbetween. I heard Michael pass back and forth across the tile floors. I told myself I would not cave; I would not allow him to know he has gotten to me. When everyone was made to look at me for a good five minutes I than heard Michael approach me. He placed his hand on top of the cane marks and put his weight into me. I bit down hard not to cry out and let a small tear pass down my cheek. Everyone of the people behind me gasped or took in a breath at the pain it must be causing me. He than leaned close to my ear and said “Who owns you?” When I let my lip go to answer I tasted the copper taste of blood and gritted my teeth and refused to answer. “Oh your not done playing. Well ok, we will just make you well used whore than.” He turned to the crowd and to my shock said. “Please raise your hand if you haven’t had any sexual pleasure in over a month.” I heard hands go up and feet shuffle. “Now raise your hand if you would do anything to put your sexual frustrations into a viable little cunt.” I head more shuffling and than he said to me “Looks like a lot of people would like to use you today.” He must have made motion for one to step forward cause I heard feet coming close to me. I could smell a different scent as they approached and could feel the heat of his body radiate against me. When he laid his hand on my inner thigh I scream out. Michael leaned in close to my ear, “What? What did you say? I can’t hear you.” I let out on big deep sigh and the tears that I had been holding in flooded my face “You own me Master, you can do whatever you wish to me anytime at your whim. Please forgive me. I beg you.” He chuckled deep than. “Oh you found your slave self again huh? Well Johnny is so hard I think you can show me how much you want to be my slave.” He released his weight from my back and removed his hand, replacing it in my hair. With a few quick movements he had me on my knees infront of the stable boy. I almost gagged at the sight of his clothes; he must have been shoveling when he was called into the house. “Johnny already had his cock out of his pants and the way I was left with my face right infront of it. Michael leaned up against the desk and simply said “Begin Hannah.” I cried as each moment passed but I eventually conceded and opened my mouth. I am sure it was probably one of the worse blowjobs I gave. I gagged and cried most of the time. But Johnny didn’t seem to mind. He came easily and even enjoying spraying it all over my face and tits. I just sat there as heard Johnny walk away from me and Michael’s command for everyone to leave. When all was quiet and I could only smell Michael’s scent close to me I sobbed so profusely. He took a washcloth to my face, and said “Your mine, and you need to learn that soon. Now before I send you off I am going to tell you the rest of your punishment. Since you seem to not enjoy when I don’t fall all over you, no one except George and Ruth will be speaking to you for the next. If you can make it all week without a demerit than you regain speaking privileges. You will eat in the kitchen, and you will have no free time. Now you better go it’s almost dinner time.” I wiped my face and legs with the cloth and grabbed my clothing. I walked out of his office without another word to him. I immediately regretted it, but knew I could not go back into his office. So instead went to our room and took a shower. When I stepped out I told myself that I was a new person, and that I would show him how much

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